Lost Party Poems

For the LOST Season 4 Finale, our group reassembled (as only we know how) to flex our creative muscles in the form of a poetry contest. In the end, all the poems were so good we couldn't pick a winner. See what you think...

LOST HAIKUS
By Jeffrey Cross

I am Jin-Soo Kwon
I've always spoken English
I'm sorry I lied

I have some secrets
Secrets which no one can know
Why should I trust you?

You have convinced me
I have chosen to confide
Please don't let me down

I must first tell you
Something you might not believe
I swear it is true

I am from Hanso
I was never on the plane
You better not tell

The truth is simple
I must kill all of my friends
And reclaim what's mine

I'm only kidding
I would never kill my friends
They shall be my slaves


LOST HAIKUS
By Sarah Cross

I'm not a monster,
Nor am I a dinosaur,
I am the black smoke.

I killed the pilot;
I tossed him up in a tree.
I am the black smoke.

I can not be tamed.
Ben thinks he can control me.
I am the black smoke.

I almost killed Locke,
But I had mercy on him.
I am the black smoke.

And Mister Ecko?
I ate that guy for breakfast.
I am the black smoke.

You think you know me?
You have no F-ing idea.
I am the BLACK SMOKE!


O KATE
By Brandon Stark

O Kate, why Jack? Why Sawyer? Why such a bad, bad girl?
O Kate, can't you see my potential?
Is it Kate? Monica? Lucy? Annie? Katherine? Maggie?
O Kate, who are you?
O Kate, I'm so glad you survived.
But that doctor will have you counting to 5
O Kate, I'm so glad you're alive.
You know where to find me ... 3362 E. Potter Drive.


SAWYER'S LOST HAIKUS (For the Oceanic Six)
By Jay Silverman

Sawyer:
Oh son of a bitch,
Oceanic Six Haikus?
Snappy nickname time.

Jack:
Appendectomy?
Too much pain for lidocaine.
Pill-popping jackass.

Kate:
Oh my sweet Freckles,
No more afternoon delight?
Engaged to the doc?

Aaron:
'Twas taken from Claire,
To be raised by another.
Kate now has The Kid!

Sun:
Madame Butterfly,
Safe at home with Ji Yeon,
But where is Sulu?

Hurley:
He fears the numbers.
My New Otherton Roommate.
Stay Puff is loco.

Sayid:
Captain Falafel,
Bug-Eyed Bastard's assassin.
All for Nadia.


LEAD ME LOST
By Lauren Marie Kutsko

Lead me down slowly weaving storylines that leave me at a cliff.
Lead me into islanders dirty secrets that leave me miffed.
Lead me towards the power of the island then drop me in the ditch.
Lead me above the mess and tell me what the hell is going on, bitch.


MUSINGS FROM A RELUCTANT LOST FAN
By Loren-Jack Kutsko

I never want to leave this island in the sun
So many new friends and so much fun

Kate and Hurley, Jack and Sawyer
Sayid and Jin, Sun and Juliet

A television obsession, but for what cost?
It's worth even getting dressed up to watch LOST

Desmond and Michael, Walt and John Locke
Benjamin, Aaron and Vincent

You think nothing changes, but what's this a flash forward?
Even during an appendectomy you'll never get bored

So many new friends, but now they all want to leave
They'd better hurry, sooner or later everyone gets bereaved

Charlie, Eko, Ana Lucia, Paulo and Shannon
Boone and Nikki, Libby and Claire?


THE COST OF LOST
By Todd-Carson Joyner

I once was told in tales of old that nothing's ever free,
And I have found this wisdom sound for true it's proved to be.
For who would think a simple show, the title just ONE word,
Could claim my life, my time, my nights, and make me such a nerd?

The show is 'LOST' and oh the cost, I hardly can describe,
The hours I lose in search of clues to explain why Charlie died.
Late night chat-rooms, forums, polls ... the answers never come,
More QUESTIONS do! And now I'm screwed 'cause look, it's half-past 1:00!!!

I never sleep, but when I do I dream of crazy islands.
I've started using nicknames and hear whispers when there's silence.
I've canceled meetings, shrugged off friends, and hung up on my Grandma,
To bake pink 'Fish Biscuits' and build a friggin' diorama!

It's really sad, and yes, I'm mad at how much time I'm losing.
But if you dared to watch, and cared, you'd understand my choosing.
Though I may never grasp the ever-escalating cost,
I've surrendered, payment rendered to the gods of LOST.

So here I am, and addict fan on another Thursday night.
Thank God I've got some addict friends who understand my plight.


LOST LIMERICKS
By Kacie Koch-Joyner

There once was a man who's a surgeon.
The girl he liked was no virgin.
Found Adam & Eve,
Who the crap is Steve?
He wants off the island, it's urgent!

There was also a preggie named Claire.
She sat in a wood rocking chair.
She abandoned her baby,
Without even a maybe,
She supposed to raise Aaron; she don't care.

John Locke is a cripple no more.
He's a hunter and killed a few boar.
Went looking for the cabin,
Some jumped on his bandwagon,
Now he's knocking on destiny's door.


WE COULDN'T LEAVE THE ISLAND
(to the tune of Billy Joel's 'We Didn't Start The Fire')
By David Ciminello

Time travel, John Locke, Richard Alpert, Black Rock,
Mr. Eko, comic books, Appendectomies.
Backgammon, Michael Dawson, spinal surgeon, Kate Austen,
Hugo Reyes, US Marshall, flash-back memories.

Book of Laws, Mikhail, dynamite, Henry Gale,
Vincent and Desmond Hume, Shannon kissed her brother Boone.
Oceanic Eight-Fifteen, Is this all a bad dream?
Sayid Jarrah, Little Annie, sail the raft at fool moon.

We couldn't leave the island,
Physics always changing, time was rearranging.
We couldn't leave the island,
We tried to sail away, but we were kept at bay.

Mr. Clucks, 'Cabin Fever', Benjamin the Great Deceiver,
Orchid Station, bad vacation, sending out flares.
Whispers, Abbadon, Sawyer is the long con,
Golf course, Kate's horse, jungle-polar bears

Hydra, Pearl, and the Flame, Sawyer loves his nicknames,
Marvin Candle in the Hatch, Apollo bars, Cyclops patch.
Rousseau, James Ford, Mittelos, wild boar,
Mr. Paik, Heroine, Who is Mr. Widmore?

We couldn't leave the island,
Physics always changing, time was rearranging.
We couldn't leave the island,
We tried to sail away, but we were kept at bay.

Jin-Soo Kwon, Looking Glass, Charlie's band 'Driveshaft',
Smo - kie's racket, Who is in the casket?
Hanso, Kevin Johnson, Who is gonna be your constant?
'Live Together Die Alone', How does Sawyer make Kate moan?

Man of Faith, do not doubt, Locke goes on a Walkabout,
Bernard, Rose, Morse code, Walt, Jack, things explode.
Films by Edgar Halliwax, Dr. Shepard fixes backs,
Season 4 has been a ball, I can't wait until the Fall!

We couldn't leave the island,
Physics always changing, time was rearranging.
We couldn't leave the island,
We tried to sail away, but we were kept at bay.


TONGUE TWISTING WITH LOSTIES
By Susan Gruenling

Oh how I adore this show
And I shall sing its praise
LOST is such a special word
Oh let me count the ways

L is for the lady on the lam in love with the good-looking leader Doc
The lustful ladies man and the liberated no longer lame Locke

L is for large and loveable 'Loco' Hurley's unlucky lottery loot
Learning life's lessons in a land littered with lean-tos built to suit

L is for the list and those left behind literally facing life and death
The island life force and the laws of nature leading them through the test

L is for the loss of life's little luxuries their loathsome location steals
And last but not least, L is for the likelihood that little will be revealed

O is for the Others and the original occupants of old
Our overjoyed over-eagerness on when the outcome will be told

O is for the omnipotent and obscure Orderly overseeing all are well
Observing the odd Orientation films that occasionally don't gel

O is for Oceanic 815 obviously not on the ocean floor shelf
The outstanding object of our obsession with this show you've outdone yourself

O is for the ornery, the overweight and the optimistic of this ordeal
The ominous obituary and the oasis that can heal

S is for the stranded ones secluded on the secret scientific shores
Where self-seeking, skillful and serious soldier Sayid hunts for boars

S is for swaggering Southerner Sawyer's smug remarks soliciting a smile
Sweet and supportive sincerities are simply not his style

S is for the sexy spinal surgeon, shipwrecked sailor, sacrifices, symbols and scotch
Your spellbinding series and stimulating storytelling is surely why we watch

S is for scary stormy smoke monster savagely searching and stalking its prey
Successfully safe, the six survivors are surprised and shocked by what they say

T is for topsy-turvy twists and turns that torment your target audience
Thought provoking theological time travel theories not to mention my two cents

T is for the treachery, the targeted, the tyrannical and the taboo
The troubled; tough and tender, oh whatever will they do

T is for my thankfulness towards Thursday night TV time
And thankfully the time has come to terminate this terrible rhyme


ODE TO ISLAND DRAMA
By Christie Cowles

There once was an island babe named Kate,
Who couldn't decide who she wanted to date.
She flirted with bad-boy Sawyer,
While dear Jack secretly adored her,
Although Juliet despised her,
The other girls admired her,
All the while Kate was planning her escape.


YOU 'LOST' ME
By Mandy Cross

Tonight I did laundry and flossed
As I sat and watched some LOST
I was partly amused
And severely confused
Perhaps it'd help to get sauced.


ODE TO HURLEY
By Lauren Marie Kutsko

Hurley is confused and sweet,
I just like the way he eats,
He's always scared to go too far,
Unless he's in a beat up car.
Just because he sees the dead,
Doesn't mean he needs to be in bed,
He freaks jack out and makes him drink,
And this is why i like Hurley i think.

How To Throw A 'LOST' Themed Party

Well, last month for the Season 4 premier of LOST, we decided to throw a themed party and pull out all the stops. It was such a success I figured, 'Why not share it with the whole world?' So here you go...

The first thing any self-respecting LOST party needs is 'DHARMA' food logos ... especially on the beer. The beer labels are already available online here. Simply print and affix to standard longneck beer bottles (will work best if you remove the existing label with a razor blade).

Next, if you're really serious about surprising your guests, the food itself needs to be LOST or ISLAND themed. In our case, for dinner we did 'Taco Night' with mango salsa & chips as an appetizer. For desert, we painstakingly created 'Fish Biscuit' cookies and served them with tropical flavored sorbets from Costco. All I can say about the cookies is good luck! I used Pillsbury pre-made sugar cookie dough, dyed it the right color using mostly red & some yellow dye, and cut them out with a 'Fish Biscuit' cookie-cutter that I hand-bent from what was originally a large heart. Lastly, when the cookies came out of the oven, I cut the fish mouths out (for authenticity) and quickly used a cake-icing letter-guide to imprint the word 'DHARMA'. This was truly a pain in the ass, but in the end ... worth it. So, like I said, good luck! Here's someone else's post about making the cookies that I found to be helpful.

Here's the stuff you'll need along with the final product

Decorations are a must and you can get as creative as you want. We did quite a few things including: Placing SUITCASES full of clothes and BACKPACKS full of dynamite around the television, Scattering COCONUTS, MANGOES, and PAPAYAS around the house, Stacking DHARMA BOXES in various places like supply drops, and Taping 'QUARANTINE' signs on all the exit doors. I even re-created a few Publisher Images from the BRAINWASHING scene and loaded them into my digital picture frame.

The dynamite was created by wrapping red paper mache around candles

The large logo was printed on multiple sheets of paper and taped together.

Poster board painted first with metallic, and then black over letter stencils

Lastly, if your group is totally obsessed and awesome like ours, you can open it up to LOST-themed costumes and props. In our case, we held a 'Prop Contest' and voted on the winner. Some people came dressed up and the props were awesome. The winner won a Beanie Baby Polar Bear.

Pictured: A diorama with real sand & power cable along with the 2 characters that found it.

Pictured: Pearl Station Pneumatic Tube, Tropical Fruits, Hurley's Comic, Connect4

Pictured: Backgammon, Bottle w Notes, Ranch Composite, Handcuffs, Kate's Plane, Virgin Mary Statue w Heroin Bag, Apollo Chocolate Bars, Golf Ball, Charlie's Guitar, and yes ... MUMMY YEMI !!!

Nice job on the 'Dexter Stratton' ring! You can't see, but she's wearing Charlie's checker board Vans too.

I love the syringe!

Now I know you're thinking we all need to get lives, but c'mon ... you only go around once. And when all was said and done, everyone had a blast being TV geeks for one night. To view an entire gallery of pics, click here. Also, to be as helpful as possible, I'm including a brainstorm list of Party Props & Decorations. Have Fun!


PROPS & DECORATIONS
Handcuffs (Spencer's)
Toy Plane (toy store)
Sand & Shells w Power Cable (Home Depot/Lowe's/Michael's)
Luggage w Clothes
Backpacks w Dynamite (spray-paint or paper-mache candles)
Tropical Fruit (coconut, mango, papaya)
S.O.S. Bottle w Hand-Written Notes
Dharma - Ranch Composite, Beer, Supply Boxes, Cans, Boxes, etc
Other Hidden Dharma Logos (toilet paper, remote control, etc)
Stuffed Polar Bear
'Driveshaft' album
Guitar w 'Driveshaft' Stickers
Pearl Station Pneumatic Tube & Notation Booklet (create using a large water bottle)
Stuffed White Rabbit painted with 15 or 8
Diorama scene (sand & shells for beach)
Digital Photo Slideshow (screenshots & pics using your computer or digital picture frame)
Quarantine Signs on Exits (use a textured spray-paint for cool effects)
Boardgames: Backgammon & Connect 4
Hurley's Comic Book (purchase online or re-create)
Download Hatch Computer Clock (recommend Yahoo widget version here)
Fish Biscuit Cookies
Apollo Chocolate Bars (print and wrap around Hershey bars)
Virgin Mary Statue w Heroin bags (obviously fake)
Hurley's Golf Flag (long branch with red surf shorts)
Caged Sawyer & Kate cut-outs (dog kennels work well)
Strap a homing beacon to your dog
Eko's stick (good luck)

FOOD & BEVERAGES
Fresh tropical fruit (pineapple, mango, papaya)
Themed drinks (daiquiri, pina colada, mai tai, mini liquor bottles, MacCutcheon Scotch, served in halved coconuts)
Taco Night
Mango Salsa
Mr. Cluck's Fried Chicken (slap logos on KFC or Church's)
Dharma products
Apollo Chocolate Bars
Tropical sorbets
Sushi (sea urchin? ...eww)
Airplane food trays (could use frozen dinners)

DRESS UP IDEAS
Dharma workers (jump suits, syringes, beer)
Charlie (F.A.T.E. on fingers, 'Not Penny's Boat' on hand, hoodie, checker vans, guitar)
Kate (plane in envelope, handcuffs, orange juice w white powder, wedding dress)
Jack (shaved head, scratches on face, mini liquor bottles, black suit)
Locke (khaki pants, bald head, large knife, bowl of orange paste, wheelchair)
Sawyer (long hair, suitcase full of monopoly money, hoard of medicine, hand-written note)
Sayid (long curly black hair, tank-top, transmitter, pictures of Nadia)
Rousseau (rifle, tank-top, music box, notes)
Ethan (crazy hair cut, Wisconsin hoodie, syringe)